Not, but you should have stopped being the parent of a child when she grew up.

>Should I feel sorry for your kids or are you not a parent?

You should feel sorry for yourself, and the idea that your ideals of parenting are the only ones there are out there. Here's a small pointer to a larger universe for you: http://www.amazon.com/Bringing-Up-B%C3%A9b%C3%A9-Discovers-P...