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There are some kinds of plans that greatly benefit from exact schedules, but those are fewer than you'd think.

When the agreed time for a meeting is arbitrary, it shouldn't really matter that the meeting is re-scheduled. It only causes problems if you have so many tasks in your agenda that you can't change the arbitrarily assigned time for the meeting - but if you're in that situation, perhaps your schedule is already too busy?

What would happen if you became ill? Or if bad weather made it impossible to arrive to the meeting? If you find valid the answer of "well, in that case some meetings can be re-scheduled or cancelled", then why would you not find that acceptable for all your planned tasks in normal circumstances as well?



Because extraordinary circumstances (becoming ill, or bad weather making it impossible to arrive at a meeting) are by definition not ordinary or normal circumstances, and so holding both to the same standard doesn't necessarily make sense?

If you're not going to hold to a schedule, why make a schedule at all? Why not just say "We'll talk sometime" and let it happen when it happens?

edit: And just because I'm not able to rearrange my schedule literally at the arbitrary whims of the person I'm meeting with doesn't mean that I'm too busy? It means that I have plans for later in the day, and not all plans are fluid. If I'm planning to get dinner with my fiancee at 6pm and you show up two hours late to a 1 hour meeting that was supposed to start at 4pm, is it my fault for having the indecency to schedule dinner with my family, or is it your fault for being two hours late?

I'm not trying to be combative, even though I know it reads that way. I just think it's a weird thing to say "if you can't rearrange your schedule, then probably you're too busy; if you can move one thing, why can't you move all things" and I'd be interested in having a discussion about that mode of thinking.


As I see it, you want to have your cake and eat it too.

Real life is hard. When that situation presents itself, you'll have to decide what's more important at the moment. The dinner with your fiancee or the meeting? I do these kinds of decisions every single day. It requires patience and cojones.

Americans want to do it all to the detriment of their sanity and health. Just pick the most important thing and do it. Reschedule the meeting or the dinner. Whatever has the lowest priority.


"The dinner with your fiancee or the meeting? I do these kinds of decisions every single day." - what decision?! If you scheduled something with someone to a certain hour and then you have other appointments, if the person does not arrive on time is not your fault and you've got to move on to the next appointment!

Taking the example of CocaKoala: you schedule a meeting, that is supposed to last 1h, to 4pm. So the meeting would take place from 4pm to 5pm. Then you'd schedule to have dinner with your fiancée at 6pm. Well, has the meeting supposedly finished at 5pm, you can get on time to this dinner. BUT if the person you're meeting with decides to only show up ate 6pm, all your later appointments will be ruined! I would never wait 2h for someone, especially if I have other appointments. And if you hope that someone will wait for you all that time either that person is too much patient with you or doesn't have anything else to do...

Btw if you make an arrangement, it's your responsibility to show up on time! Is not about how busy you or the other person are, is about respect!!

Best regards ;)


I agree that real life is hard. I don't understand how making a schedule with somebody and asking them to hold to it counts as "having the cake and eating it too", though; can you clarify that?


If you're not going to hold to a schedule, why make a schedule at all? Why not just say "We'll talk sometime" and let it happen when it happens?

Exactly! The comments in this thread are making that possibility look like an evil thing.


No, no, no; you misunderstand. I'm not saying that's an evil thing; I'm perfectly happy to say "We'll talk sometime" and let it happen when it happens, and I suspect everybody else is as well. What people are objecting to is SAYING "We'll talk at 3pm" and MEANING "We'll talk sometime". If you don't want to make a plan, the proper way to do that is to not make a plan, instead of making a plan and then thinking later "Well geeze, I gave my word that I'd meet this guy at 3pm but I'd really like to take a walk instead, so maybe I'll show up this evening instead".




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