I don't mean any of the following as flame-war type criticism, so I hope you are able to find a way not to take it that way.
Stories by women* about their perceptions of the hostile sexualization of many work and conference environments are themselves part of the case being made that women are being held back.
(You would perhaps be shocked how many men share many of the same concerns, and not just out of solidarity with women.)
Ambivalence of the sort you claim and the concomitant disinclination to engage and try to understand things like the late night coffee invitation incident is part of what is holding women back.
I'm not* saying that you're actively choosing to make the world a worse place. Further, as beings of finite attention and lifespan it's quite true that we can't possibly pay attention to everything.
In your writing I do hear a bit of something that makes me thing you might want to understand what the big deal is, but it just hasn't "clicked" for you. Perhaps this is because you find the existing discussions off-putting, or perhaps because the things you read about are about situations that wouldn't be a big deal for you personally.
If you're interested in understanding more, I'm wiling to continue the conversation here or elsewhere.
Even if not, I'd encourage you to keep dipping your toes in the conversation from time to time.
Stories by women* about their perceptions of the hostile sexualization of many work and conference environments are themselves part of the case being made that women are being held back.
(You would perhaps be shocked how many men share many of the same concerns, and not just out of solidarity with women.)
Ambivalence of the sort you claim and the concomitant disinclination to engage and try to understand things like the late night coffee invitation incident is part of what is holding women back.
I'm not* saying that you're actively choosing to make the world a worse place. Further, as beings of finite attention and lifespan it's quite true that we can't possibly pay attention to everything.
In your writing I do hear a bit of something that makes me thing you might want to understand what the big deal is, but it just hasn't "clicked" for you. Perhaps this is because you find the existing discussions off-putting, or perhaps because the things you read about are about situations that wouldn't be a big deal for you personally.
If you're interested in understanding more, I'm wiling to continue the conversation here or elsewhere.
Even if not, I'd encourage you to keep dipping your toes in the conversation from time to time.