During my first manic episode I was handed sertraline. This pushed the mania full send and I lost a lot of time that I can't account for, things I did I can't remember but friends have recalled. Climbing the house to get in through the upstairs window whilst having the house key on me. Locking myself in my room for a week or two convinced I was the real world John Connor and Arnie was looking for me. Blowing all my savings on cocaine for me and anybody in my vicinity in a month. Going through a gram of mdma more than once in a night. Feeling like I was on a therapeutic dose of MDMA for a few months and thinking this was what SSRIs were meant to feel like. The list goes on.
I will admit I was semi cognizant of the distorted thinking/reality so played it down when talking to the psychiatrist I was urgently (+2 months into it) referred to for early psychosis intervention. I was eventually handed a dozen valium (which the doctor was incredibly hesitant to prescribe, for good reasons) which let me sleep and the mania lifted.
I'm terrified of SSRIs now. I have been diagnosed bipolar for a few years now (went private because in the UK unless you're a danger you're ignored). This week was the first session with a clinical psychologist in a bipolar group. Unsurprisingly almost everyone had a similar experience with SSRIs.
I'm speculating here but I'm pretty sure if you did an MRI on my brain you'd see lesions from the mixing of mdma and sertraline (I get myoclonic jerks to this day).
SSRIs are definitely not commonly recommended or normally used for treating bipolar disorder - especially not for people who are showing signs of a manic episode.
Unfortunately, this is one of the major limitations of our diagnosing abilities with mental illness: when someone presents with severe depressive symptoms and no other known history of mental illness, we have no real way of telling whether it should be classed as Major Depression, or whether it may be Bipolar disorder.
So, sadly, yours is a common story where people with bipolar disorder that initially manifests with a depressive episode get treated with SSRIs that then push them into their first manic episode. I've had a good friend go through something very similar (though, thankfully, less severe in terms of intensity of the manic episode).
If you were given SSRIs to handle the start of your manic episode, that to me seems like a gross mistake by your physician.
> I'm speculating here but I'm pretty sure if you did an MRI on my brain you'd see lesions from the mixing of mdma and sertraline (I get myoclonic jerks to this day).
Could you speak more to this? A family member was recently diagnosed with myoclonic jerks without a clear root cause, so treatment has been hit or miss so far. I’m trying to learn what I can to help inform them.
I will admit I was semi cognizant of the distorted thinking/reality so played it down when talking to the psychiatrist I was urgently (+2 months into it) referred to for early psychosis intervention. I was eventually handed a dozen valium (which the doctor was incredibly hesitant to prescribe, for good reasons) which let me sleep and the mania lifted.
I'm terrified of SSRIs now. I have been diagnosed bipolar for a few years now (went private because in the UK unless you're a danger you're ignored). This week was the first session with a clinical psychologist in a bipolar group. Unsurprisingly almost everyone had a similar experience with SSRIs.
I'm speculating here but I'm pretty sure if you did an MRI on my brain you'd see lesions from the mixing of mdma and sertraline (I get myoclonic jerks to this day).