It seems like the problem is the home and your parents.

Think about it logically, if you had a kid would you let them end up like you?

You need like some complete psychological and lifestyle reset. Consider joining the military, volunteering in Africa, working on an oilrig, anything as long as it's extreme. Like, whatever most firmly cuts off your whole thread of lived experience and mindset so far but which has structure you can hang on to.

Also find an aggressive therapist who'll get in there and work out what's going on and clean it up, and pay them whatever they ask.