As another example, I was treated horribly by a ex-spouce for years, and for some reason I didn't leave, and only covered up for my spouce's bad behavior. Retrospectively it was destructive, but in the moment it felt like the right thing to do (in a very roundabout way). I don't want this to happen again, so I'm trying to understand and catch behaviors that got me there in the first place.

But if we drop the false nostalgia and think of about the overall "we think too much and feel too little" sentiment - i can relate to that.