I'm friends with somebody who seems to suffer from this. I'm not talking mouth open lip smacking eating or slurping, just noise of using cutlery and chewing something not crunchy and swallowing seems to set them off at times. They've had outbursts at me before. I didn't really take offense, maybe felt embarrassed or defensive but I tried to be quieter. Which actually seemed to make things worse because I was awkwardly trying to be careful, but maybe it was just because I was focusing on it more.
In any case that still wasn't good enough for them, so I proffered some helpful suggestions for alternative solutions to the problem, which was that they take themselves somewhere else, or they could learn to deal with it themselves. Unfortunately this was taken extremely personally and caused great offense, judging by the reaction.
I have even pointed out to them when they are eating loudly and they do the revenge chew thing you're talking about, lol. I don't think the rational part of their brain has reconciled the fact that it's not actually possible for them to eat silently with their unreasonable demands of others.
At some point if your behavior is outside the norm, things are going to go more smoothly for you if you cater to the rest of society and deal rather than the other way around. You can always ask people to eat quieter and maybe they should but you'll certainly annoy and/or embarrass many people by asking, that's the reality.
> The only thing I find to improve it is to not be tired or stressed when eating with others, or lively conversation as a distraction. Easy, right?
That does actually sound easy unless you work at a restaurant or on a submarine or something.
As a sufferer it does need to be a 2-way street. We cannot expect perfection from others, but we can ask people close to us to be mindful and do their best, whatever their best is. On the flip side, sufferers do need to seek out therapy, help, treatment, coping strategies, and anything else to attenuate the issue. Even taking the stress/impact from a 10/10 down to a 6/10 can do wonders for everyone involved.
In any case that still wasn't good enough for them, so I proffered some helpful suggestions for alternative solutions to the problem, which was that they take themselves somewhere else, or they could learn to deal with it themselves. Unfortunately this was taken extremely personally and caused great offense, judging by the reaction.
I have even pointed out to them when they are eating loudly and they do the revenge chew thing you're talking about, lol. I don't think the rational part of their brain has reconciled the fact that it's not actually possible for them to eat silently with their unreasonable demands of others.
At some point if your behavior is outside the norm, things are going to go more smoothly for you if you cater to the rest of society and deal rather than the other way around. You can always ask people to eat quieter and maybe they should but you'll certainly annoy and/or embarrass many people by asking, that's the reality.
> The only thing I find to improve it is to not be tired or stressed when eating with others, or lively conversation as a distraction. Easy, right?
That does actually sound easy unless you work at a restaurant or on a submarine or something.