I get the point about conversations naturally splitting when there are 5+ people... definitely happens to me all the time. But I wonder if it’s really just about mental limits, or if there’s something else going on? Like, isn’t it also about the vibe of the group or the type of people involved? Some groups are just better at keeping everyone engaged no matter the size- like certain friend groups or teams that have great dynamics.
Also, not sure if the "four is magic" thing holds up everywhere... In my experience, some of the best conversations happen with just two people. Like really deep, meaningful stuff you can’t get with more people. And for bigger groups, there’s often this chaos energy that can be fun in its own way. Yeah, it’s not the same as an intimate chat, but it’s not worse, just different.
That said, I do like the idea that our brains are wired for certain sizes - makes sense when you think about the mental juggling it takes to track other people’s thoughts and reactions. And I love how Dunbar tied this to Shakespeare—kinda cool that he instinctively kept scenes small to avoid "cognitive overload." Makes me wonder if modern writers and creators even think about this stuff or just stumble into it.
So yeah, the mental limits idea is interesting, but I feel like the type of people, the setting, and even the purpose of the group matter a lot too. Sometimes it’s not the number of people, but how good they are at making everyone feel included... which is maybe a rarer skill than we think.
Also, not sure if the "four is magic" thing holds up everywhere... In my experience, some of the best conversations happen with just two people. Like really deep, meaningful stuff you can’t get with more people. And for bigger groups, there’s often this chaos energy that can be fun in its own way. Yeah, it’s not the same as an intimate chat, but it’s not worse, just different.
That said, I do like the idea that our brains are wired for certain sizes - makes sense when you think about the mental juggling it takes to track other people’s thoughts and reactions. And I love how Dunbar tied this to Shakespeare—kinda cool that he instinctively kept scenes small to avoid "cognitive overload." Makes me wonder if modern writers and creators even think about this stuff or just stumble into it.
So yeah, the mental limits idea is interesting, but I feel like the type of people, the setting, and even the purpose of the group matter a lot too. Sometimes it’s not the number of people, but how good they are at making everyone feel included... which is maybe a rarer skill than we think.