Yeah, the game I'm talking about was like this. I spent 80+ hours a week on it. I spent literal years of my life on World of Warcraft, stagnating my life for almost a decade because of it. I was in one of the top guilds in the world for while. It was a full time job and to my detriment.
I hate every time I think about it, I could have been learning to code, advancing my career and doing interesting things that I think back fondly about. Instead there's just a void in my life where I did nothing, learned nothing, and copied other people's builds in a game and hit buttons really fast and stayed out of the red areas during raids while hitting buttons fast. It makes me feel gross.
You learned how to maintain a membership in one of the top groups of one of the top games. that's not exactly a marketable skill on paper, but you sound like someone who knows how to grind when you set your mind to it. As someone with ADHD who can't stop chasing squirrels, I admire that.
Try to forgive yourself. You can't take it back. The time you spend in regret is more time you are losing to the game. Maybe you can turn your experiences into something that can help yourself or others.
Well, you are probably right. I imagine quite a few people on here had time-consuming digital lives at some point or another.
What you have shown yourself is you can stick with something. Why not try something else now, that you can do for the rest of your life? Carpentry? Guitar playing? Not obsessively, but just regularly. You have time.
I'm sorry you feel that way. Do you mind me asking a couple of questions? Did you enjoy it at the time, or was it more numbing or just compulsive thing?
And was it a social thing? Did you make friends, enjoy talking to people etc?
I hate every time I think about it, I could have been learning to code, advancing my career and doing interesting things that I think back fondly about. Instead there's just a void in my life where I did nothing, learned nothing, and copied other people's builds in a game and hit buttons really fast and stayed out of the red areas during raids while hitting buttons fast. It makes me feel gross.