> But it does mean something to some ppl, and some of these ppl do notice it being said or avoided
Yes, but that is very context-dependent. The rule of thumb is “don’t be stupid” and “don’t be a dick” (yes, offensive to eunuchs and people who think this excludes women; in which case replace with “twat”). The words you need to avoid to that effect depend on who you’re talking to and in which circumstances. Blanket bans based on lists of words someone is crusading against are counter-productive.
> And after hearing that from someone you care about
The first time can just be a mistake; people you care about do not have the exact same mindset you have. In that case, a short explanation should suffice, without implying malice. If it is a pattern, then the people you care about don’t care as much about you.
OTOH, it is unreasonable to expect a random stranger on the Internet to be aware of your sensitivities.
Yes, but that is very context-dependent. The rule of thumb is “don’t be stupid” and “don’t be a dick” (yes, offensive to eunuchs and people who think this excludes women; in which case replace with “twat”). The words you need to avoid to that effect depend on who you’re talking to and in which circumstances. Blanket bans based on lists of words someone is crusading against are counter-productive.
> And after hearing that from someone you care about
The first time can just be a mistake; people you care about do not have the exact same mindset you have. In that case, a short explanation should suffice, without implying malice. If it is a pattern, then the people you care about don’t care as much about you.
OTOH, it is unreasonable to expect a random stranger on the Internet to be aware of your sensitivities.