hirvi, this is brilliant and so relateable, so thank you. Mine are very similar, but I would add with respect to your points...
1. Yes, but I also have to know that I am the one in charge... otherwise I will not take charge, but I will be ready to be told exactly what to do, and THAT I will do very quickly. [see A below]
2. Also yes, and true for software development too, but it makes the long burn so difficult. Give me a fire to put out! I casually know an ER doctor who is highly regarded, but his personal life is a mess and he's into extreme sports. (And saw my son when he came in with a suspected neck fracture.)
3. Again, yes. Once a solution has been found, I'm done! Implementing it? Naaah... that's the boring stuff.
4. Sort of... I think due to personality and temperament yes, but also upbringing.
Two more points building on those.
Autism and adhd have a high co-morbidity. If someone has social skills to the point where others comment on how good they are; highly unlikely that's you. If the idea that you "intellectualise social interaction" rings a bell, it might be the case.
Sensitivity issues. This is a reason behind my addition to point 1 above. The most mild of corrections comes across as an accusation that one is am totally worthless and useless. A constant running inner critic devaluing every thought and action. My experience is that this is silenced or at least turned down by medicating with stimulants... and it is totally liberating.
Thank you, and I greatly appreciate your comment as well.
1. I can sympathize.
2. I am software engineer that has and currently played various extreme sports, so there is probably a strong correlation lol.
3. I don't have enough bandwidth to implement thing sometimes when the RAM is maxed out and I do not have any Swap Space.
4. Makes sense. My family was predominantly in the medical field and they constantly would have to talk with lonely and/or bored patients all the time. So, you are probably on to something.
> "intellectualise social interaction" rings a bell
I tried to search for what this meant, but I found a few differing ideas that I didn't know which one to attribute to what you meant. Do you mind elaborating?
I do tend to talk fast and talk a lot. It used to get me in a lot of trouble in school growing up because I would basically talk non-stop (wasn't diagnosed or treated during those times). I still talk a lot, but I have grown out of a lot of it.
I have sound sensitivity issues like misphonia and I hate going to concerts despite being a musician at one time due to how painful I find the volume. If I go, I have to wear earplugs or I find it physically painful to be a setting that loud. Same thing with small engine devices like chainsaws and other machinery.
I do not think I have co-morbid Autism, but if I do not, then I probably missed a good chance -- then again, there is probably symptom overlaps between the two.
3. Yes, that too. It becomes burn-out at the worst.
>> "intellectualise social interaction" rings a bell
> I tried to search for what this meant, but I found a few differing ideas that I didn't know which one to attribute to what you meant. Do you mind elaborating?
That was the goal behind me asking... if it did ring a bell; I think you'd know! I pre-plan social interactions, they inevitably never go as planned, then I spend forever ruminating on what I did wrong. Rinse, repeat.
To your concluding paragraph, I think a way to join back up these disparate threads is a reminder that ADHD and autism are both non-binary, spectrum conditions... they're labels slapped on a grab bag of manifested difference->disorder->disability symptoms, hence diagnostic criteria that are: "has to have 5 out of 8 of these factors".
Thanks for your examples, a lot of that really hits home, especially the stimulants. I have been trying to figure out why I can't quite function without caffeine, not in a get a headache and feel sleepy sort of way, but that without it I feel really listless and almost depressed.
1. Yes, but I also have to know that I am the one in charge... otherwise I will not take charge, but I will be ready to be told exactly what to do, and THAT I will do very quickly. [see A below]
2. Also yes, and true for software development too, but it makes the long burn so difficult. Give me a fire to put out! I casually know an ER doctor who is highly regarded, but his personal life is a mess and he's into extreme sports. (And saw my son when he came in with a suspected neck fracture.)
3. Again, yes. Once a solution has been found, I'm done! Implementing it? Naaah... that's the boring stuff.
4. Sort of... I think due to personality and temperament yes, but also upbringing.
Two more points building on those.
Autism and adhd have a high co-morbidity. If someone has social skills to the point where others comment on how good they are; highly unlikely that's you. If the idea that you "intellectualise social interaction" rings a bell, it might be the case.
Sensitivity issues. This is a reason behind my addition to point 1 above. The most mild of corrections comes across as an accusation that one is am totally worthless and useless. A constant running inner critic devaluing every thought and action. My experience is that this is silenced or at least turned down by medicating with stimulants... and it is totally liberating.