> You do this kind of thing to get ahead in a certain world where you want to achieve something that you wouldn't normally achieve if you did things, as you say, "naturally".
I don't want to live in that world.
> You say you would never go to a house party full of people you don't know. Would you go to one that has lots of people you do know -- i.e. your friends?
Certainly. New people are fine in moderation, I'd just never go to a party full of strangers. It'd be no fun at all.
> Let me ask you something ... as an introvert, how do you plan to meet someone e.g. a girl you are attracted to, if your immediate circle of friends wouldn't introduce you to one? How do you meet people if you never go to events full of people you don't know?
You don't have to actively seek to attempt to introduce new people to your social circles to run into them anyway. You meet friends of friends without it being planned. You meet new people when following your own interests as a side effect without meeting new people being the goal.
> Actors in hollywood, etc. have to hustle and make connections. Same goes for musicians, comedians any other performing art. They can't ALL be creepy can they?
Yea, they pretty much are, because they're always selling something, always trying to use you in one way or another to forward their cause; it's annoying, insulting, self centered, and causes many introverts to avoid these types of people all together.
> If you do this systematically with everyone (e.g. think about what a promoter would appreciate before coming to the party) then you aren't being creepy, you are being considerate
I agree with that. But if you're being considerate while also thinking how can I use this to my advantage, then it's no longer considerate even though it appears to be. To me it's not your actions that make something considerate, it's your intentions.
If I met someone who consistently helped me out here and there, but I also noticed that every time, it also helped him out in some way then I would no longer consider what he does friendly, I'd consider it manipulative and avoid socializing with that person. Real friends help you even when it's not to their benefit, not just when it's convenient to them.
This is all just how I feel of course, but I doubt I'm alone in this regard. I'm sure many introverts feel the same.
I don't want to live in that world.
> You say you would never go to a house party full of people you don't know. Would you go to one that has lots of people you do know -- i.e. your friends?
Certainly. New people are fine in moderation, I'd just never go to a party full of strangers. It'd be no fun at all.
> Let me ask you something ... as an introvert, how do you plan to meet someone e.g. a girl you are attracted to, if your immediate circle of friends wouldn't introduce you to one? How do you meet people if you never go to events full of people you don't know?
You don't have to actively seek to attempt to introduce new people to your social circles to run into them anyway. You meet friends of friends without it being planned. You meet new people when following your own interests as a side effect without meeting new people being the goal.
> Actors in hollywood, etc. have to hustle and make connections. Same goes for musicians, comedians any other performing art. They can't ALL be creepy can they?
Yea, they pretty much are, because they're always selling something, always trying to use you in one way or another to forward their cause; it's annoying, insulting, self centered, and causes many introverts to avoid these types of people all together.
> If you do this systematically with everyone (e.g. think about what a promoter would appreciate before coming to the party) then you aren't being creepy, you are being considerate
I agree with that. But if you're being considerate while also thinking how can I use this to my advantage, then it's no longer considerate even though it appears to be. To me it's not your actions that make something considerate, it's your intentions.
If I met someone who consistently helped me out here and there, but I also noticed that every time, it also helped him out in some way then I would no longer consider what he does friendly, I'd consider it manipulative and avoid socializing with that person. Real friends help you even when it's not to their benefit, not just when it's convenient to them.
This is all just how I feel of course, but I doubt I'm alone in this regard. I'm sure many introverts feel the same.