I'm not interested in physicist/philosophers. Only in the people who run design, set up, and run the experiments.
You're watching a bunch of people with strong opinions about what QM theory implies for the real world. I come from a different direction: I'm recognizing that most of my intuitions about physics, which come from large particles (classically modelled atoms), are just completely and totally useless. And that ncludes the temporal ordering of events.
I don't think there is any mystery.
Another reference: https://arxiv.org/abs/1905.03137
"The 'Delayed Choice Quantum Eraser' Neither Erases Nor Delays" - R. E.Kastner
She has published books on the foundations of quantum mechanics (not a experimentalist, though...).