> I hate this idea that addiction is someone just getting high so they don't have to feel bad feelings, which seems to be the underlying assumption of most discussions.
But then the rest of your comment is a story about your father seemingly doing exactly that. What have I misunderstood here? Not trying to be flippant, I'm genuinely confused.
I struggled with addiction to alcohol and cocaine for a long time. I would not say, at least do feel it’s the case, I was trying to escape. It was fun, and as time when on it was just a thing I did. Eventually my body started feeling it and it took me two years to get clean (I still drink about once a month.) But nowhere along that decade long road did I ever feel like I was escaping my life. I was amplifying it, I can write twice the code on cocaine (I’m already pretty fast) and alcohol is a social thing, I got hooked because it was cool to drink so I drank more than everyone else. I would be the last guy up at a party.
I think the other poster, whether what he said was correct or not, is right that it is a disservice to chalk an addict up to someone escaping life. This removes the majority of drug addicts who got hooked from pain after surgery and now can’t stop, or the ones who could stop but enjoy the feeling it creates. Not all drug addicts are homeless people sleeping on the streets. I have an ex who’s sister runs a chain of stores and she’s a legit meth head, you could never tell though because she does it in moderation and doesn’t look like she takes anything at all.
Yeah, I also found it slightly conflicting. I think the author is probably saying that those bad feels are probably not an answer in themselves but have an underlying cause that often gets overlooked.
I will also add that suppressing nightmares is about being able to sleep through the night so you can do your job the next day, not necessarily about avoiding negative feelings per se. Plenty of people take sleeping pills and are not characterized as addicts for trying to address their sleep issues so they can function.
suppressing nightmares = avoiding bad memories or past experiences
being able to sleep through the night = experiencing peace artificially
not necessarily about avoiding negative feelings per se =
its about avoiding past experiences and not being able to face the 'issues' because you think they will break you or annoy you
I have a serious medical condition that can seriously interfere with my sleep at times. I see absolutely no contradiction in saying "Addiction is not just about avoiding bad feelings" and saying "I think he drank to suppress his nightmares."
Multiple people have told me that's a contradiction and I'm wrong to take that position. It's probably not worth arguing any further and needs to be filed under "We can just agree to disagree on this detail."
I really appreciate your comments on this site, this comment and all the other ones that I've seen over the years, because you give a much needed reality check and are articulate and honest.
I do think though, that it is a contradiction to say that. Avoiding nightmares is exactly about avoiding bad feelings. Other people might end up doing it earlier in the day if they don't have anything around them.
> I hate this idea that addiction is someone just getting high so they don't have to feel bad feelings
That's exactly what addiction is. Getting high is just fun.
> I think he didn't need to actively suppress his nightmares anymore after he dropped his retirement papers and no longer had to live in fear
> Avoiding nightmares is exactly about avoiding bad feelings
Why? Perhaps you don't mind the fact that you have nightmares, but they keep waking you up and keep you from being well-rested in the morning? I've had plenty of nightmares that ended with me waking rested in the morning and plenty of ones that made it so sleep was basically impossible after. The latter is worth avoiding, the former might not be. But their nightmare-ness is equally unpleasant.
> I hate this idea that addiction is someone just getting high so they don't have to feel bad feelings, which seems to be the underlying assumption of most discussions.
But then the rest of your comment is a story about your father seemingly doing exactly that. What have I misunderstood here? Not trying to be flippant, I'm genuinely confused.