I had to create another account just to reply. I had nocprocrast turned on for hacker news (the irony!)
Practical:
1. I lost 30 lbs from 200 lbs to 170 lbs
How I did it.
Step#1. Made an irreversible decision.
I pay $100 every week if I miss losing 2 lbs that week.
The deal was for 12 weeks.
I started Monday and the deal is every Monday. I have to stand on the scale and take a pic and send it.
2. I solved 200+ Leetcodes over a span of a year
Deal. I had to solve 10 problems a day on random days. Each missed problem costed me $25 per miss.
Here is another guy who became ripped i.e 6 packed within 6 months
See. The deal is this. The answer to procrastination is not more information. There is no magic info online that will change your brain and you stop procrastinating. You already know procrastinating is bad. You already know that you need to small chunk the work. You already know you need to be disciplined. You know you need to "just get started" or "just need to do it NOW!" that life is made up of choices and you need to make a choice.. You know this and yet...
YOU WON'T DO IT!
There is this movie called "Memento" where all these concepts are already discussed.
Here is the gist.
You are not ONE person. That's why nothing has worked so far and nothing will work in the future too. (likely)
You are a multitude of people living inside of you. The you that is going to nod your head or is going to be "inspired" is not the same person who is going to wake up tomorrow. You listen to a video and have an "aha" moment but the you two days from now will not follow through on your grand plan. This is like a relay race between different versions of YOU and the problem is that there is a version of YOU that is definitely going to drop the baton.
Now. You can hit rock bottom or want success as bad as you want to breathe air and then you will get what you want. This is what everyone already knows.
But what if you kind of want to be ripped or kind of want to be done writing a book or just not sufficiently determined. Is there a mechanism by which you can still do the things you don't normally have enough motivation to do?
The answer is a contract.
Beeminder is one such but the biggest flaw is that you are still in charge so you can easily renege on it.
Likewise for Stickk etc.
Instead do this:
1. Make an irreversible decision where you are not the one to call off the deal. Just like a mortgage, internet bills, rent, cell phone bills etc.
Watch yourself automatically, automagically achieve ridiculous stuff that previously you would Never have been able To do.
This is a 100% anti self help approach.
Note: I did lose a solid 30 lbs from 200 lbs to 170 lbs. But the problem is that once the contract expires I will likely go back to 185 lbs.. eventually.
Likewise, you will never develop natural self discipline with this approach but hey.. it works..
You got me interested as well on "a multitude of people living inside of you". A model which works suitably for me is just the adult and the big child.
The adult is writing this text. (Hey, after all he's the only one able to write or read!)
The big child, is literally me as a child plus the sexuality that came later.
(There's also an animal, but it is only noticeable in the most extreme circumstances. You know, table tennis and the like.)
With this model it all boils up to the child being tricked by the adult. Yes, it is tempting to assume that the adult is "raising" the child, but no. Internally it feels more like the child needs to be tricked into compliance, then all gets well (i.e. the child is seemingly happy after it is shown its place).
But, a multitude?...
I have trouble imagining any more personas. I'm curious how does that feel like? Multiple "adults" at the same time? Sequentially?
From the movie "Memento": This explains it better.
Here's the truth: People, even regular people, are never just any one
person with one set of attributes. It's not that simple. We're all at
the mercy of the limbic system, clouds of electricity drifting through
the brain. Every man is broken into twenty-four-hour fractions, and
then again within those twenty-four hours. It's a daily pantomime, one
man yielding control to the next: a backstage crowded with old hacks
clamoring for their turn in the spotlight. Every week, every day. The
angry man hands the baton over to the sulking man, and in turn to the
sex addict, the introvert, the conversationalist. Every man is a mob, a
chain gang of idiots.
This is the tragedy of life. Because for a few minutes of every day,
every man becomes a genius. Moments of clarity, insight, whatever you
want to call them. The clouds part, the planets get in a neat little
line, and everything becomes obvious. I should quit smoking, maybe, or
here's how I could make a fast million, or such and such is the key to
eternal happiness. That's the miserable truth. For a few moments, the
secrets of the universe are opened to us. Life is a cheap parlor trick.
But then the genius, the savant, has to hand over the controls to the
next guy down the pike, most likely the guy who just wants to eat
potato chips, and insight and brilliance and salvation are all
entrusted to a moron or a hedonist or a narcoleptic.
The only way out of this mess, of course, is to take steps to ensure
that you control the idiots that you become. To take your chain gang,
hand in hand, and lead them.
It's interesting to me that you mention the "not one person" viewpoint. I am forced through traumatic past experiences to live my life consciously aware of these other "me"s and them of "me", as a result of dissociation. We have to actively communicate with each other internally and work together. Things don't happen if we don't agree on them, or other "me"s will go off and do their own thing and we have to get on the same page to keep that from happening. Lots and lots of therapy.
Want to lose weight? I have to have every part of me on board, if one of me doesn't want to and instead wants to eat crap, they can and will and we lose our progress.
I can't count the number of times the dev-minded parts of myself resolve to work on X project or leetcode/day only to wake up the next day switched to a different personality that doesn't remember making that resolution, or even know how to work on code. There are parts of me that cannot even comprehend code another part of me has written, but when the part that wrote it comes back it's crystal clear. It has to be communicated among everyone inside that we have the goal to work on X and time has to be given to the parts that want to and can, consciously (if we're even able at the time).
There are still other parts with the internal authority to say that X thing will happen and they will show up every day to enforce their expectations. This doesn't happen often, usually in very stressful periods.
Any time a part of me wants to make a long term change in my habits, appearance, or behavior it must be put to a quorum majority vote. If there is not a quorum or majority we cannot make the change, or the formation of the habit or new behavior will fail. If we have a quorum but a conflict in what we want to do any given moment, we end up procrastinating. Parts of me can try to make their own routines and habits, or do their own activities if they have time alone, but inevitably if it's against collective will it gets put to an end quickly.
We have to have a contract with ourselves to be functional in day to day life. There is no reneging on the contract when we are forced to share a single life in this way.
When we agree? It's powerful. Lost 100lbs in 2018, saved up and moved across country in the middle of the pandemic last year, got a new job, a new car, and started moving forward in our career.
Also we get to use We/They/Them pronouns which is fun (I like to joke that technically any pronoun could be used for us.)
Very interesting idea. If you had to pay, who did you pay? My thought is the money would go to charity, but since that is (usually) a good thing then I don't know if paying money for failing is a good enough incentive.
I hired a contractor and I paid him when I failed. You should be hell bent on not paying a dime. Otherwise you are doing it wrong. If it goes for charity then your mind will sniff out an escape route. Instead give it to causes you don't believe in. The goal is to be afraid of failing. You should be kicking yourself and feel the pinch when your hard earned money is going out of pocket. Otherwise you are doing it wrong.
Here's the deal. Even when you fail you still will win in the end and that the beauty of this approach.
I lost 30 lbs over the course of 4 to 6 months. I lost around $200 - $300 and it definitely stung. But it was worth it for now I have a strong and fit body.
Once you create or sign a deal its a done deal. You can't renege on that. You sign an agreement with the other person and they will hold the money hostage till either the deal is completed or not.
