Yeah I think part of it is the attitude/illusion that the stakes used to be were lower earlier in life. Like, "oh how cute, they are sweating so much about petty things like teenage love and fitting in cliques, if only they knew how much it doesn't matter in the grand scheme of things"
But it does matter a lot in those years. Teens are correct in their assessment that fitting in is important. At least in some group. Doesn't have to be the "popular kids". As you grow up, achievements and status become more manifest, it's not so much about pretenses. Things are now more cemented and move slower. You have this or that profession with a certain status. You live in a good or a bad neighborhood, move in fancy or non fancy circles, can afford traveling or not, and so on. By contrast in your teens and early adulthood, all you have is how you perform in social interaction. Later you're like "maybe I'm awkward but I'm a surgeon and you're a fast food worker".
And when you're 60, the status fights are mostly over, you're living off of what you achieved earlier. So you think it was useless because now you have little to lose in future potential. You mostly have your familial and friendship situation cemented for the rest of your life, usually no more worry about who will marry you, whether you can be promoted high, whether your kids turn out good etc. Typically 60+ year olds don't have to prove themselves in the moment any more, they just ride on the past.
But it does matter a lot in those years. Teens are correct in their assessment that fitting in is important. At least in some group. Doesn't have to be the "popular kids". As you grow up, achievements and status become more manifest, it's not so much about pretenses. Things are now more cemented and move slower. You have this or that profession with a certain status. You live in a good or a bad neighborhood, move in fancy or non fancy circles, can afford traveling or not, and so on. By contrast in your teens and early adulthood, all you have is how you perform in social interaction. Later you're like "maybe I'm awkward but I'm a surgeon and you're a fast food worker".
And when you're 60, the status fights are mostly over, you're living off of what you achieved earlier. So you think it was useless because now you have little to lose in future potential. You mostly have your familial and friendship situation cemented for the rest of your life, usually no more worry about who will marry you, whether you can be promoted high, whether your kids turn out good etc. Typically 60+ year olds don't have to prove themselves in the moment any more, they just ride on the past.