Sounds more like a mis-configuration on desktop environment specific, rather than a problem with Linux or Wayland. I'm using Sway with Wayland and don't experience any of the issues you mention. In fact, I find that it is easier to read than Windows and definitely a lot snappier.
See that is the problem. Sure everything is fine if all I use is sway + alacritty and terminal based apps on a single screen but as soon as I mix in multiple terminals, x11 apps, glitchy hdpi, experience starts to deteriorate quickly
There is a current bug with Chromium that I'm aware of that causes issues if you have windows open on multiple desktops. Other than that I don't have these problems. May I suggest you check out the Arch Wiki for Sway and Wayland for suggestions for configuration.
