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What hits me is a sense of meaninglessness.

I can be disciplined enough to stick with something as part of a lifestyle, or whatever I find consistently rewarding, e.g. an exercise regimen and cooking new things. When it comes to creative projects, I'll get to the point of having a rough outline but often just ditch the rest. Particularly with music more-so than writing, the pursuit feels pointless or unimportant, and I always got the sense that the special catalyst with music is people, feeding off the passion of other musicians. I tend now to skip the BS and just go straight to composition since that is the aspect of music that most interests me.




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