Yes, I feel the exact same way. I think it's unethical to pass those costs on to the user. At a very minimum, they should at least be given the option to decide.
E.g. 'We can give you a refund OR you can choose to support us right now. If you do we'll give you a free upgrade to XYZ some later time this year.'
E.g. 'We can give you a refund OR you can choose to support us right now. If you do we'll give you a free upgrade to XYZ some later time this year.'