It's more than hubris and mistrust. The moment they inject you with radiation to stage you as you begin the process of treatment is rather illuminating.
Hearing that Geiger counter tick behind you. Hearing it start screaming as the nurse arrives with a lead hypodermic containing radioactive sugar.
Seeing her approach your arm with that fucking thing.
Watching as the needle approaches your vein, about to puncture the skin.
Freeze frame right there. Now let's consider that moment. You have a decision to make. Will you let them do something that will harm you to try to cure you? That is a difficult decision for most people. It requires a tremendous leap of faith. It is equivalent to being awake as they're about to saw off a limb to save your life from a gangrenous infection.
Cancer treatment has many of these moments. Every time you're infused with doxorubicin and vincristine each chemo cycle is another of these moments.
Deciding to let someone hurt you badly to try to save your life goes against our primal instinct and takes a tremendous amount of rational will to overcome that resistance.
Being treated for cancer and choosing a treatment path isnt an impassive collegial debate in a HN thread. It is a visceral experience that results in complete submission to a terrifying process that involves cutting and poisoning your body. In many cases the treatment is very effective. But alternatives begin to look pretty fucking good as you start down that path.
Hearing that Geiger counter tick behind you. Hearing it start screaming as the nurse arrives with a lead hypodermic containing radioactive sugar.
Seeing her approach your arm with that fucking thing.
Watching as the needle approaches your vein, about to puncture the skin.
Freeze frame right there. Now let's consider that moment. You have a decision to make. Will you let them do something that will harm you to try to cure you? That is a difficult decision for most people. It requires a tremendous leap of faith. It is equivalent to being awake as they're about to saw off a limb to save your life from a gangrenous infection.
Cancer treatment has many of these moments. Every time you're infused with doxorubicin and vincristine each chemo cycle is another of these moments.
Deciding to let someone hurt you badly to try to save your life goes against our primal instinct and takes a tremendous amount of rational will to overcome that resistance.
Being treated for cancer and choosing a treatment path isnt an impassive collegial debate in a HN thread. It is a visceral experience that results in complete submission to a terrifying process that involves cutting and poisoning your body. In many cases the treatment is very effective. But alternatives begin to look pretty fucking good as you start down that path.