I'm pushing 40 and am starting to measure my productivity by how much code I remove in a day, not how much I write. Is anyone else feeling that way? That much of what we do is a waste of time, that perhaps software is evolving in wrong directions due to issues like income inequality (wealth and expertise being at opposite ends of the spectrum) or worse is better? Sometimes I stare at the ceiling realizing that the entirety of what I'm working on can be represented by a symlinking filesystem or Excel spreadsheet. I'm not.. tired, more like, I'm tired of witnessing everything I've ever worked on being obsoleted in 3 years because yet another framework reinvents the wheel or proprietary solution opens a new market due to vendor lock-in. How did the web of declarative interoperating data become walled gardens and SAAS? There is money to be made yes, but is this progress?
At some point, the problems fall away and it all starts to look more like the wheelings and dealings of Mad Men than computer science. Then the choice seems to be whether to make the most of things (find meaning in the unfulfilling) or take an early retirement.
I'm not worried about finding work after I'm over the hill.. I'm worried about the very real possibility of my legacy being a portfolio instead of a real contribution to the betterment of humankind - building an R2D2 or software that actually frees people from labor. Anything short of that real progress feels like a waste of time, and I understand why it might not be prudent to hire someone who doesn't have profit as a primary motive. What really keeps me up at night is the thought that the idealism I’m feeling is nearly identical to what I felt as a youth, and I don't know if something has gone terribly wrong with the state of things or if the world just passed me by.
P.S. I love my job. Really! I’m just running out of time for the future to arrive when I could be working on it now.
I feel very similar at times. I don't mind re-inventing the wheel if it's a much faster wheel, but typically... they hit the same pitfalls that the first wheel-builders hit.
I do love my job, but I also don't want to move to the next new, hot framework because it's new and hot. I keep wondering if this is what burnout feels like, but then when I get home and I can work on any project I want, I find that there is so much cool stuff to learn that I get excited.
"it all starts to look more like the wheelings and dealings of Mad Men than computer science"
Yeah, in many ways the tech field (and corporations/startups in general) are bad just parodies of themselves. But the dog and pony show still gets funding, so there are still jobs out there, so I guess it's not all bad. But after a while it does get a little hard to get all starry-eyed about some new web framework or instant messaging app.
There are still some companies that do interesting things, (depending on what you're in to) but you might have to look beyond the typical e-commerce startup. Things like robotics, artificial intelligence, new medical technology, etc. Things that actually could make the world better (though of course technology is amoral, and could always be abused to make the world worse).
At some point, the problems fall away and it all starts to look more like the wheelings and dealings of Mad Men than computer science. Then the choice seems to be whether to make the most of things (find meaning in the unfulfilling) or take an early retirement.
I'm not worried about finding work after I'm over the hill.. I'm worried about the very real possibility of my legacy being a portfolio instead of a real contribution to the betterment of humankind - building an R2D2 or software that actually frees people from labor. Anything short of that real progress feels like a waste of time, and I understand why it might not be prudent to hire someone who doesn't have profit as a primary motive. What really keeps me up at night is the thought that the idealism I’m feeling is nearly identical to what I felt as a youth, and I don't know if something has gone terribly wrong with the state of things or if the world just passed me by.
P.S. I love my job. Really! I’m just running out of time for the future to arrive when I could be working on it now.