I'm in a similar boat too! I found verbalizing it with anyone who will listen helps the anxiety.

Bayesian statistics to the rescue! You hear about the things that (can) go wrong a lot more, than the babies that are born without an issue. Basically, the opposite of survivorship bias? Anywho, millions of babies are born each day. Only 3-4% are born with a major birth defect or severe health issue (in the US) [0]. Now, a pregnant woman will undergo a routine screening, such as non-invasive prenatal test (NIPT) or a detailed anatomy ultrasound. With a positive test result, the probability of the baby being born healthy goes up to 99%+. Even with a negative test, the probability of the baby being healthy only drops to 80-50%, and then further testing will dial those probabilities in even more.

All this to say, all will be good – don't let the rare anecdotes get to you.

[0] https://www.cdc.gov/birth-defects/data-research/facts-stats/...

> I participate in some management-focused online communities.

I know - slightly off topic - but would you be willing to share this list?

I used to use the docker + homebridge route but it became tedious to maintain. Instead, I connected it via the Google Home integration (requires an Insights plan) and then use my existing Starling Home hub to access it via HomeKit. This seems to be more reliable and less work than before.

The HHI [0] attempts to quantify that. [0] https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Herfindahl–Hirschman_index

isn’t that just an estate tax?

No, that's just the conservative marketing, me dying and how much of my stuff my relatives get are not the same things.

59/60 - SDE 61/62 - SDE II 63/64 - Senior SDE 65/66/67 - Principle SDE (aka Staff) 68/69 - Partner SDE (aka Senior Staff)

> the rest tried every trick in the book to get me to the dealership before they'd give me a price

would you be able to list those tricks? I'm currently car shopping myself. how did you get them to give you a price without showing up?

> how did you get them to give you a price without showing up?

Ask. Let them know you're reaching out to other dealers. Be clear about your timeline for buying ("this weekend", "ready to buy today if I can get it at $X", etc) so they know you're not wasting their time. Don't discuss trade-in or financing.

Remember, if you're buying, financing and trading in (selling) at the same place, that's 3 opportunities for them to take advantage of you. So don't actually visit the dealership until you have a price, financing already secured (from someplace else, but stay open to theirs, too) and have an offer for your trade-in ready (Carvana or equivalent, at least), too.

> contractors can write off the expense

there's an opportunity cost for that expense. it reminds of this episode of Schitt's Creek - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hg1Uk60rBsc.

both

I wonder if for those who it was very obvious for "put their money where their mouths were" and bought a set of securities that would make them a ton of money on what was obvious when the obvious materializes in real life.

then, with that ton of money, they could buy enough shares to influence the board to implement their agenda.

in theory, this would quantify the definition of "obvious".